5/2/24 I want to talk to you Ratu Ina

 This thing that you do, day in day out...  What meaning does it give you?

What I want to know is, does it make sense?

I have been on this path for 25 years.  I had been trying to reset myself many times.  Each time I did that, I realized I had some unfinished business that I had to take care of.

Then it dawned upon me, is this really my business or am I just as Lizzie stated, "Takde kerja cari kerja"?

I don't have any pending things on my checklist.  The only thing that I probably need to do is the 22 km Hill Run.  Even that is not obligatory.

Do you think I need to do it Ratu Ina?

There are so many uncertainties looming inside my head.  One is, am I going to get paid?

The other thing is the Flight Path.  I only can visualize things that are certain.  Things that are fuzzy create FUD.  That is what I am experiencing now.  I am operating in FUD.  Not good at all.  To a beginner's mind there are many possibilities, to an expert's mind there are a few.

So tell me, Ratu Ina, with your commitment to me, tell me whether I am going to get paid.  Then I am clear about my direction.

Am I doing all these towards a Greater Good or am I just marking time knowing what I already know?

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Avoir!

SJ 4964

Postscript:  OK, I am not going to get paid.  In that case, from now on I just do things for myself.

I become an Autonomous Autotheist.  Then it is clear what I have to do.  Whatever I do is only for me and my family's only.