This is really a taxing journey. The challenge is to maintain a certain level of certainty that what I am doing is towards the greater good.
The twists and turns are so rampant that I have to latch on to a very stable reference so that I can have a reality check on the rightness of my direction.
I might as well be on a solo voyage to Mars considering that only I can decide if my journey is a sensible one or nothing more than a flight of fancy.
So what is that stable reference? I have nothing else to turn to except the notion that I am a believer. I know that this is a very fragile reference to hang on to. I too had look at it from the various angles. In the final analysis it goes back to Lillahi Ta'ala, Wallahu Alam.
That's the separator between sheer faith and delusion.
I am not worried about taking this journey to the end. What worries me that there is no end. I am not used to embark on a journey where the finishing line is my own demise.
I am not meant to lead. I am not built that way. As long as I take care of my end, I don't give a hoot about others.
The way I look at it is I was given a job and I just do my job. Once the job is done, I carve my portion and off I go.
I am not hanging around for the victory party. As a matter of fact, I completed my job years ago. So rightfully I should cruise and mind my own business.
What is there for me to do? Hence, I am seriously considering personal blogging once again. Musashi said, "Do nothing that is of no use."
I had given the full spread. That's basically it. That's all that you want to know, isn't it?
Beyond that is the perogragative of me as the Creator and the Creator's Most Loyal Soldier. All questions have been answered.
So if you can excuse me, I like to have my life back.
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